Positively Paula

3 Top Questions Remarried Couples Should Ask When They Disagree

Wednesday, June 06, 2012
This week I had the pleasure of interviewing Chuck Semich, our advice columnist at RemarriageWorks. Our episode, "Top Secrets of Stepfathers" is one of my favorites because I don't think there are enough resources available for stepdads. During the show, dedicated to all stepfathers in honor of Father's Day, Chuck, a licensed family therapist who specialized in blended family relationships and is both a stepchild and stepfather himself, offered a spot check or inventory that we can ask ourselves when we are arguing...  
I asked Chuck for his best advice on how to make your remarriage succeed. Chuck described the top three questions he has asked himself when he has been in a disagreement:
  1. Is this a matter of life or death? 
  2. Am I part of the problem, or part of the solution?
  3. What's more important - being right, or having a healthy relationship?
If you take a moment and think about these questions the next time you and your spouse are arguing, especially about a blended family issue, you can really change your own perspective, and diffuse your anger or frustration. I've tried it. I haven't succeeded in calming myself down every time, but with practice, it gets better.

I invite you to listen to the podcast, "Top Secrets of Stepfathers" with Chuck Semich, and to check out his stepfamily advice in our advice column. His professional and personal experience, along with his wisdom are really helpful. If you and your spouse are facing problems in your remarriage, consider listening to the podcast together.
Listen to internet radio with Stepmoms Toolbox on Blog Talk Radio

Recent Posts


divorced stepdad professional mediation wedding invite wording blending financial problems carla david design separated remarried with kids stepmoms stepmotherhood stepfamily coach encore brides spouse stepfamily challenges families Yaffa Balsam alimony custody blended family ex familymoon stepfamily with a special needs child stepfamily advice Father's Day family court divorce mediation stepbrother Stepmom's Toolbox national stepfamily day foundation encore wedding Northern Virginia Mediation Service love for grown-ups joint custody second marriages stepson's stepmom separation stepfamily terms wedding invitation wording stepparenting brady bunch stepmothers blended families stepmother national stepfamily summit remarries remarrying brides mediation step parent Mrs. Delaware wedding invitations shared joint custody step-grandparents custody battle stepson wedding invitation stepparents stepfamily relationships problems in your remarriage NARME stepfathers co-parenting plan second time around National Stepfamily Day co-parenting stepfamilies freedmont mortgage stepfather Justice Harvey Brownstone stepsons exes divorcing child support Chuck Semich stepparent late wife's family second wedding planning para-kin.com step family stepfamily counseling remarried custody lawyer the garter brides christy borgeld remarry second honeymoon United States of America Blended Family Association stepdads marry remarriages stepmoms-to-be second wedding after divorce post divorce second weddings Journal for Stepmoms second wedding invitations USABFA encore bridal specialist blending your credit histories stepchildren stepfamily blending families widowhood father rights divorce IDEALS of Kentucky stepfamilies with special needs kids stepfamily support group widowed mediators stepfamily meeting stepfamily counselor marriage education bonus mom family law judge DIY wedding invitations wedding invite stepfamily names carl delmont encore bridal dress family law court step-grandma merging two families family marriage remarrying bride Mother's Day stepchild therapist remarriage remarrying journaling blended stepdaughter remarriage works weddings and children stepkids relationships marrying United States Blended Family Association family therapist Garter Brides Stepmoms Toolbox family matters RemarriageWorks previous marriages relationship questions judge's verdict children stepfamily life second marriage fatherhood family law attorney stepfamily issues Kim Olver stepfamily experience stepmom's remarriage journey


Tell Us More About Your Second Wedding!

1. How much did you spend on your second wedding?

$0 - 1,000
$1,001 - 5,000
$5,001 - 10,000
$10,001 - 20,000
$20,001 or more


Here's What You're Saying

“I find your site extremely helpful and resourceful in dealing with the many and daily issues of parenting, co-parenting and life issues that come along.” –J.P.

“I love the information you all provide. The magazine was so helpful in trying to navigate the remarriage with kids territory. Thank you for all of your information and inspiration you provide.” –K.W.

“Have I mentioned HOW MUCH I love your site?!?!? It's really cool. . . . I'm getting married to a man that has two kiddos, and it's quite a lifestyle change for me!” –M.M.

Win a Copy of
Eat, Drink and Remarry

This is not your mother’s second wedding! Getting married again? Wondering why the planning is harder than you thought it was going to be? Enter to win a copy of Eat, Drink and Remarry by Stacey Tucker!

Tweets from RemarriageWorks!